593 lines
20 KiB
JavaScript
593 lines
20 KiB
JavaScript
export default [
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{
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title: "Wild Berry Fizzy Pop Powder",
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description:
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"Recording my experience burning Wild Berry’s Fizzy Pop incense powder.",
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synopsis:
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"Recording my experience burning Wild Berry’s Fizzy Pop incense powder.",
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url: "/img/gallery/wild-berry-fizzy-pop/",
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date: new Date("May 28, 2026"),
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galleryImage: "wild-berry-fizzy-pop-powder-8.webp",
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galleryImageAlt: "",
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pictures: [
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{
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title: "Preparing the censer",
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filename: "wild-berry-fizzy-pop-powder-1.webp",
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altText:
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"A brass incense censer with a tool holder and stencil next to a jar of the incense powder.",
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thumbAltText:
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"A brass incense censer with a tool holder and stencil next to a jar of the incense powder.",
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caption: "I feel guilty for sullying this censer.",
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},
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{
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title: "Electric blue",
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filename: "wild-berry-fizzy-pop-powder-8.webp",
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altText:
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"A brass incense spoon scooping bright blue powder from the top of a jar.",
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thumbAltText:
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"A brass incense spoon scooping bright blue powder from the top of a jar.",
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caption: "Just look at the color of this stuff!",
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},
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{
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title: "Adding powder",
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filename: "wild-berry-fizzy-pop-powder-2.webp",
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altText:
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"Putting the electric blue powder atop the brass stencil with a tiny incense spoon.",
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thumbAltText:
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"Putting the electric blue powder atop the brass stencil with a tiny incense spoon.",
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caption: "No turning back now.",
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},
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{
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title: "Adding more powder",
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filename: "wild-berry-fizzy-pop-powder-3.webp",
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altText:
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"Putting more electric blue powder atop the brass stencil with a tiny incense spoon.",
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thumbAltText:
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"Putting more electric blue powder atop the brass stencil with a tiny incense spoon.",
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caption: "Fully committing.",
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},
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{
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title: "Stencil loaded",
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filename: "wild-berry-fizzy-pop-powder-4.webp",
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altText:
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"The grooves of the brass stencil are full of blue incense powder, revealing the shape of an auspicious cloud.",
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thumbAltText:
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"The grooves of the brass stencil are full of blue incense powder, revealing the shape of an auspicious cloud.",
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caption: "That color is wild.",
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},
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{
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title: "Time to get lit",
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filename: "wild-berry-fizzy-pop-powder-5.webp",
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altText:
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"A plasma lighter hovers ominously over the tail of a trail of blue incense powder in the shape of an auspicious cloud, atop a flat layer of ash in a brass censer.",
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thumbAltText:
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"A plasma lighter hovers ominously over the tail of a trail of blue incense powder in the shape of an auspicious cloud, atop a flat layer of ash in a brass censer.",
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caption: "Here we go.",
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},
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{
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title: "Time to get lit",
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filename: "wild-berry-fizzy-pop-powder-6.webp",
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altText:
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"A long, angry-looking ember travels down the trail of blue incense powder.",
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thumbAltText:
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"A long, angry-looking ember travels down the trail of blue incense powder.",
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caption: "What a wicked looking ember.",
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},
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{
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title: "Finally over",
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filename: "wild-berry-fizzy-pop-powder-7.webp",
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altText:
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"A long, angry-looking ember lights the final stretch of the incense seal, leaving a trail of very dark black ash.",
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thumbAltText:
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"A long, angry-looking ember lights the final stretch of the incense seal, leaving a trail of very dark black ash.",
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caption: "At last.",
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},
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],
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},
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{
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title: "Cooking",
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description: "Some stuff I've made in the kitchen.",
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synopsis: "Some stuff I've made in the kitchen.",
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url: "/img/gallery/food/",
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date: new Date("October 20, 2025"),
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galleryImage: "_DSC0036_compressed.webp",
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galleryImageAlt: "",
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pictures: [
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{
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title: "A batch of palmiers",
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filename: "_DSC0033_compressed.webp",
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altText:
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"Fifteen sugar-encrusted palmier pastries on a cooling rack atop a wooden table. The cookies are curled on both ends such that they resemble ears.",
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thumbAltText:
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"Fifteen sugar-encrusted palmier pastries on a cooling rack atop a wooden table. The cookies are curled on both ends such that they resemble ears.",
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caption:
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"2025-10-18 - Part of a batch of palmiers I made over the weekend; these crunchy, sugary little ears are quite possibly my favorite thing to make with a box of frozen puff pastry.",
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},
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{
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title: "Would you believe this is tofu?",
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filename: "double-frozen-silken-tofu.webp",
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altText:
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"What looks like seared sliced chicken breast on top of some greens next to some pickled beet slices.",
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thumbAltText:
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"What looks like seared sliced chicken breast on top of some greens next to some pickled beet slices.",
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caption:
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"2025-03-27 - This is what you get if you freeze and defrost silken tofu twice, press hard to drain all water, then sear in a pan.",
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},
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],
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},
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{
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title: "Illustration",
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description:
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"I'm not much of an illustrator, but here are a few things I've done over the years.",
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synopsis:
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"I'm not much of an illustrator, but here are a few things I've done over the years.",
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url: "/img/gallery/illustration/",
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date: new Date("October 20, 2025"),
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galleryImage: "doodle.webp",
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galleryImageAlt: "",
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pictures: [
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{
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title: "Just a wee ice-cream doodle",
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filename: "doodle.webp",
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altText:
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"A rubber-hose doodle of an ice cream cone holding two mini ice-cream cones.",
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thumbAltText:
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"A rubber-hose doodle of an ice cream cone holding two mini ice-cream cones.",
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caption:
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"Doodled this one day and decided to do a vector trace for fun.",
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},
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{
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title: "A vector illustration of a vape",
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filename: "Evod Vector-01_white_copy.webp",
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altText: "A vector illustration of an old-school Evod vape pen.",
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thumbAltText: "A vector illustration of an old-school Evod vape pen.",
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caption:
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"I made this many years ago when vapes were just hitting the market for a website selling e-liquid. The site actually won Adobe Muse Site of the Day!",
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},
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{
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title: "A vector illustration of an empty e-liquid bottle",
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filename: "10MlBottleVector-08_copy.webp",
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altText: "A vector illustration of a 10ml e-liquid bottle.",
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thumbAltText: "A vector illustration of a 10ml e-liquid bottle.",
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caption: "I also made this for the aforementioned website.",
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},
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{
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title: "A vector illustration of a Sony Xperia Phone",
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filename: "sony illustration-01.webp",
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altText: "A vector illustration of an old-school Sony Xperia phone.",
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thumbAltText:
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"A vector illustration of an old-school Sony Xperia phone.",
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caption: "I made this just for fun. It took ages.",
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},
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],
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},
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{
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title: "Pop Tart Flavor Memes",
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description:
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"One day, almost certainly when I ought to have been doing something more important, I discovered a meme format featuring Pop Tart boxes edited to have outlandish flavors on the packaging. Naturally, I had to collect as many as I could find. Here's what I've got:",
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synopsis: "Some very unusual Pop Tart flavors…",
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url: "/img/gallery/poptarts/",
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date: new Date("November 26, 2024"),
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galleryImage: "pop_tart_flavor_2.webp",
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galleryImageAlt: "",
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pictures: [
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{
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title: "Frosted New England Clam Chowder",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_1.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted New England Clam Chowder",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Tree Bark",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_2.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Tree Bark",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Boot Leather",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_3.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Boot Leather",
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caption: "I've dropped this bad boy on a twitter thread or two.",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Kermit",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_4.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Kermit",
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caption: "Is it worth it?",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Bare Chest",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_5.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Bare Chest",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Lysol Wipes",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_6.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Lysol Wipes",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Mine Tarts",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_7.webp",
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altText: "Minecraft Frosted Grass Block",
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thumbAltText: "Minecraft Frosted Grass Block",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Earth Worms",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_8.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Earth Worms",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Ground Beef",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_9.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Ground Beef",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Black Coffee",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_10.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Black Coffee",
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caption: "Unironically: I'd eat this.",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Gasoline",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_11.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Gasoline",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Tide Pods",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_12.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Tide Pods",
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caption: `I once saw a lady drop a container of Tide Pods in the supermarket; without thinking I blurted out: "Oop, five second rule!" and didn't even get a laugh. Brutal.`,
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Hot Dog Water",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_13.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Hot Dog Water",
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caption:
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"Frankly, I'd sooner have the frosted lysol wipe Pop Tarts. 🤮",
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},
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{
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title: "NY Style Sewer Rat",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_14.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "NY Style Sewer Rat",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Caviar",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_15.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Caviar",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Elmer's Glue",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_16.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Elmer's Glue",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Crusty!",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_17.webp",
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altText: "Crusty! Cement Flavor",
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thumbAltText: "Crusty! Cement Flavor",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Nuclear Waste",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_18.webp",
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altText: "Frosted Nuclear Waste: Made with real waste!",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Nuclear Waste: Made with real waste!",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Beans",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_19.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Beans",
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caption: "I'd give it a shot.",
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},
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{
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title: "Shower Pack",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_20.webp",
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altText:
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"Shower Pack, 3 in 1 formula! Shampoo, conditioner, and body wash.",
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thumbAltText:
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"Shower Pack, 3 in 1 formula! Shampoo, conditioner, and body wash.",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Limited Edition",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_21.webp",
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altText: "Limited Edition: Just the Crust",
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thumbAltText: "Limited Edition: Just the Crust",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted McDonald's Sprite",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_22.webp",
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altText: "Frosted",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Fresh Cut Grass",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_23.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Fresh Cut Grass",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Windex",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_24.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Windex",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Popcorn Ceiling",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_25.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Popcorn Ceiling",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Sharkboy & Lavagirl",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_26.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Sharkboy & Lavagirl",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted The Sun",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_27.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted The Sun",
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caption: "I don't know why, but I feel like these would be delicious.",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Axe",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_28.webp",
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altText: "Frosted Axe body Spray",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Axe body Spray",
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caption: "I would simply die.",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Miracle Whip",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_29.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Miracle Whip",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Water",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_30.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Water",
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caption: "I'd give it a shot.",
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},
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{
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title: "Encrusted",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_31.webp",
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altText: "Encrusted Play-Doh",
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thumbAltText: "Encrusted Play-Doh",
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caption: "They'd smell delicious at least.",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Aluminum Foil",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_32.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Aluminum Foil",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Frosted Orange Juice and Toothpaste",
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filename: "pop_tart_flavor_33.webp",
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altText: "",
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thumbAltText: "Frosted Orange Juice and Toothpaste",
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caption: "Honestly, this may be the worst of them all.",
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},
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],
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},
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{
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title: "Shots from April 2024",
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description:
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"Sol and I went out for a walk down the street with a couple of cameras.",
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synopsis:
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"Sol and I went out for a walk down the street with a couple of cameras.",
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url: "/img/gallery/april2024/",
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date: new Date("January 23, 2025"),
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galleryImage: "april_2024_4.webp",
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galleryImageAlt: "",
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pictures: [
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{
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title: "Sol shoots some flowers.",
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filename: "april_2024_1.webp",
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altText:
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"A person in a beanie staring down a camera viewfinder at some tulips.",
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thumbAltText:
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"A person in a beanie staring down a camera viewfinder at some tulips.",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "We were being watched…",
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filename: "april_2024_2.webp",
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altText: "Some cats staring at us through a window screen.",
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thumbAltText: "Some cats staring at us through a window screen.",
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caption: "Somehow I don't mind these nosy neighbors.",
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},
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{
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title: "A pole.",
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filename: "april_2024_3.webp",
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altText: "A closeup of a black painted pole with stickers on it.",
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thumbAltText: "A closeup of a black painted pole with stickers on it.",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Love this storefront.",
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filename: "april_2024_4.webp",
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altText:
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"A storefront painted vividly with lots of colors, dots and flowers.",
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thumbAltText:
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"A storefront painted vividly with lots of colors, dots and flowers.",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Another pole.",
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filename: "april_2024_5.webp",
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altText: "A wide, beige painted pole covered in ads and notices.",
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thumbAltText: "A wide, beige painted pole covered in ads and notices.",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "Can't get enough of that pole.",
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filename: "april_2024_6.webp",
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altText:
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"A mushroom-like green canopy on top of the beige pole, with lettering spelling out Roscoe Village.",
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thumbAltText:
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"A mushroom-like green canopy on top of the beige pole, with lettering spelling out Roscoe Village.",
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caption: "",
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},
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{
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title: "The infamous Chicago Rat Hole.",
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filename: "april_2024_7.webp",
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altText:
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"An impression in the sidewalk of what is likely a squirrel; it is filled with coins and rocks left as tribute.",
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thumbAltText:
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"An impression in the sidewalk of what is likely a squirrel; it is filled with coins and rocks left as tribute.",
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caption: "That has to be a squirrel.",
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},
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{
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title: "A courtesy to cyclists.",
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filename: "april_2024_8.webp",
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altText:
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"A crusty old parking meter with a ghost sticker and graffiti on it. Inside of the meter window reads: Meter remains as a courtesy to cyclists. Please pay at pay box.",
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thumbAltText:
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||
"A crusty old parking meter with a ghost sticker and graffiti on it. Inside of the meter window reads: Meter remains as a courtesy to cyclists. Please pay at pay box.",
|
||
caption: "",
|
||
},
|
||
{
|
||
title: "A brick building.",
|
||
filename: "april_2024_9.webp",
|
||
altText:
|
||
"The front of a red brick building with two potted plants in front of the door. The wall has many of those little square glass-tiles to allow in light while affording privacy.",
|
||
thumbAltText:
|
||
"The front of a red brick building with two potted plants in front of the door. The wall has many of those little square glass-tiles to allow in light while affording privacy.",
|
||
caption: "",
|
||
},
|
||
{
|
||
title: "Weed.",
|
||
filename: "april_2024_10.webp",
|
||
altText:
|
||
"A closeup of a dandelion ready to have its seeds blown into the wind.",
|
||
thumbAltText:
|
||
"A closeup of a dandelion ready to have its seeds blown into the wind.",
|
||
caption: "",
|
||
},
|
||
{
|
||
title: "Another creative storefront",
|
||
filename: "april_2024_11.webp",
|
||
altText:
|
||
"A storefront with painted illustrations of a woman giving a baby a bath, and several stylized women carrying baskets of fruit and flowers on their heads.",
|
||
thumbAltText:
|
||
"A storefront with painted illustrations of a woman giving a baby a bath, and several stylized women carrying baskets of fruit and flowers on their heads.",
|
||
caption: "",
|
||
},
|
||
{
|
||
title: "A robin crossing the street.",
|
||
filename: "april_2024_12.webp",
|
||
altText:
|
||
"A robin runs across the street, casting a long shadow for such a small fellow.",
|
||
thumbAltText:
|
||
"A robin runs across the street, casting a long shadow for such a small fellow.",
|
||
caption: "",
|
||
},
|
||
],
|
||
},
|
||
{
|
||
title: "Shots on film",
|
||
description: "Some random pictures I took on film years ago.",
|
||
synopsis: "Some random pictures I took on film years ago.",
|
||
url: "/img/gallery/film/",
|
||
date: new Date("October 20, 2025"),
|
||
galleryImage: "3.webp",
|
||
galleryImageAlt: "",
|
||
pictures: [
|
||
{
|
||
title: "Tat",
|
||
filename: "1.webp",
|
||
altText:
|
||
"A not-very-good close-up of some oils, spices, and sauces on a kitchen counter.",
|
||
thumbAltText:
|
||
"A not-very-good close-up of some oils, spices, and sauces on a kitchen counter.",
|
||
caption: "I do like to take pictures of random tat.",
|
||
},
|
||
{
|
||
title: "A scented candle",
|
||
filename: "2.webp",
|
||
altText: "A scented candle on the corner of a table.",
|
||
thumbAltText: "A scented candle on the corner of a table.",
|
||
caption: "More tat.",
|
||
},
|
||
{
|
||
title: "A pretty old camera",
|
||
filename: "3.webp",
|
||
altText: "A blurry Pentax camera.",
|
||
thumbAltText: "A blurry Pentax camera.",
|
||
caption:
|
||
"Given to me, like the camera I am using to take the picture, by a photography friend years ago.",
|
||
},
|
||
{
|
||
title: "Double exposure tat",
|
||
filename: "4.webp",
|
||
altText:
|
||
"A double exposure of a carved wood incense burner in the shape of a man and a surreal silk painting.",
|
||
thumbAltText:
|
||
"A double exposure of a carved wood incense burner in the shape of a man and a surreal silk painting.",
|
||
caption: "Is that a box of Satya in the background? Hard to say.",
|
||
},
|
||
{
|
||
title: "Birds on pot",
|
||
filename: "5.webp",
|
||
altText: "Some bird silhouettes sat atop a chimney pot.",
|
||
thumbAltText: "Some bird silhouettes sat atop a chimney pot.",
|
||
caption: "Dare to resist pot.",
|
||
},
|
||
{
|
||
title: "Streetlamp",
|
||
filename: "6.webp",
|
||
altText:
|
||
"A streetlamp with snow on top, by some snowy trees, all in front of a stone building.",
|
||
thumbAltText:
|
||
"A streetlamp with snow on top, by some snowy trees, all in front of a stone building.",
|
||
caption: "Pretty sure I took this through a window.",
|
||
},
|
||
{
|
||
title: "The cutting edge",
|
||
filename: "7.webp",
|
||
altText: "A small electric paper guillotine.",
|
||
thumbAltText: "A small electric paper guillotine.",
|
||
caption: "Lost a fingernail to this thing once.",
|
||
},
|
||
],
|
||
},
|
||
];
|